Three weddings in the last four weeks and I find myself dwelling on the fact that I will never have the chance t to give away a daughter or dance with her at her wedding. I know it was probably best that Jackie and I didn’t have a daughter because as I think about it I would have been a push over. Still, I think it would have mellowed me considerably and I wonder how much different would I be today? Jackie and I don’t really talk about it. I don’t want her to feel any regret since I know I do.
To give a daughter away must be such a bittersweet moment. One on hand you’re a proud father who has watched a child grow and mature into adulthood. On the other hand it is your child whom you’ll always see as your child. It is strange how I see my sons, I know they are young men but they are still my boys and always will be. I’m sure most parents have the same feelings about their children.
I think I’m bothered now at this point in life because I would be nearing the time that if I had a daughter she would probably be getting serious about all the aspects of her life. This would probably be the time she would begin to realize some of her dreams, goals or hopes. I’m seeing positive growth in Michael and Stephen and wonder what I would be seeing out of a daughter?
Sometimes we must hurt in order to grow and I understand that. I’m sure there is a lesson in my longing/desire or at least I think there might be. I have always been told that some lessons are learned best through pain. Maybe there is a life lesson in this that I have to learn and maybe I have to learn through a little hurt or pain.
Anyway, just a random blog that really only means something to me, thanks for humoring me by reading this one.
No comments:
Post a Comment